Friday, December 31, 2010

Five Hours to 2011

I supposed that 2010 is a good year for me, because this year, I'm officially 18. I always thought that being an 18 should be special. Yes, at least better than just being a 16, 20, or 21. I wanted it to be special, because I thought college life rocks. But its not that. Nothing special, but I'm grateful that I knew some awesome people. Thanks Wei May, Jia Min, Cammy and Raymond. You're awesome. :)

But its weird that I do not hang out often with them. I got no idea why. But its just weird. I became more like an anti social. I don't talk to my classmates. Sometimes, not even a 'Hi' or 'Bye'. Maybe I'm just too used to be with my old groups. And I expect the same from them, because I thought they would really feel the same as me. Not feeling comfortable with the new people and the environment. But its just not like that. People grow up and they can be anyone they want to be. I want to be myself, the one that I always thought that I'm so friendly, I got bunch of friends. But I just can't. Something stopped me, that something would somehow makes me think that I'm annoying. Its like why everyone can have such a great life with their new friends but not me. Its like I did not put any effort to be close with my new friends and still asking for the bunch's attention. I don't like it like that. :(

But I guess, this is the time to let it go. I don't wanna end my 2010 with lots and lots of regrets. Regretting why I do this and not did that.

Spent 3 hours with a bunch of friends, and that was really awesome.Talking bout what we did last time, sharing those happy and awkwards memories. Still being so pahlia when we are together. Lol. Next time, next time we shall go sing k already!! :D

To the reckless, I miss you guys dowhhh, even we've just met a week ago. But I do miss you guys. I always hope to spent every special moment with you guys, but its just so not gonna work. Phailed!!! :( Please people, make some effort to do a great outing or gathering. I'm tired being the organizer and always get ffked. I still love you guys!!! <3

My family, I love them most!!! There's always some love hate relationship between me and the brothers. But whatever it takes, we are family and nothing can change us. No matter how much I hate you, its somehow equivalent to how much I love you. Love mama,cousins and the brothers max!! Ohhh, and of course their half. :) (Oh damn, if the small bro got his own girlfriend, I think I'm gonna be the only pathetic single in the family. T_T)

To everyone I love, if 2010 is a bitch, don't give it a damn. Cause I just felt the same. I don't know what happened, but everything just goes wrong this year. But I finally learnt something,
I feel great because I realize if you can't tear a single page of your life, you can throw the whole book in the fire. ;)
To the readers, I know I have let you guys down for some times. And yes, the way I tell is like I got a lot of readers, but I know, I know. They are countable but yet, I appreciate your views. I love you, mua readers. Please keep viewing. :D

And to whoever who dislikes me, go get a life!! 

love, J

No comments: